so, for those who have been living on a different planet or in a coma i'll catch you up. my husband, bryce, passed away on 11-19-09. he had just turned 32 on 11-7. our 2 kiddo's, were 1 & 2 at the time. we have had so many milestones to pass already, thanksgiving, brycer's b-day, christmas, laine's b-day, and our nephew bradyn's b-day. they have all sucked without him. i usually don't like the term "sucked" but there is no other way to describe it.
people say that time heals all wounds, i think those people have never had to suffer thru any terrible event. time just makes the pain more manageable. i am still waiting for that to start happening. the day he passed this hole appeared inside me, an emptiness i have never felt before. my family all lives away from me and i've gone thru a divorce, so i have experienced some "life". in 12 days it will be 3 months. damn, 3 months! my life has stopped and 3 stinking months have flown by. i am so thankful that i have laine and brycer to keep me going. their non-understanding has been a blessing. at the same time it breaks what's left of my heart that they won't have their own memories of their dad. they will just hear all the great stories from all the friends and family who will keep him alive in their minds.
i don't want this to be totally depressing to read, so i'll share a funny story. i know bryce was looking down saying "cledus, are you serious?" cledus was my nickname, don't ask how i got it, don't know. or t-rex arms b/c he said i had short arms. lol those of you who know me know that i'm not the first in line when it's time to clean. i'm clean, just alittle messy :) so i decided to vacuum and somehow i got tangled up in the cord. i fell, bigtime, and sparained my ankle. which in my mind just goes to show my hatred of cleaning really is justified. haha let me tell ya it was a sight to see, my big ol butt crashing to the ground with 20 ft of cord wrapped around my feet. my dad says he paid for 13 yrs of ballet to have a graceful daughter, well it hasn't kicked in yet dad!! i think all hope is lost. :)
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